Friday, January 14, 2011

Feeling a little sad today

Yesterday we found out that we were moving our church service to another church, in a city close to us. It just so happens that it is the same city Rush lives in. So, I text my mom to see if we could stay over night and have a visit in the morning.  She said it was fine and that she was not sure what Rush's plans were.

I sent her a text asking her to just let Rush know the plans and that she can choosed from their depending on what her plans are.  This is the status I see on her "secret" to us facebook page: can't f'ing believe this why the "f" do I have to change my plans just cuz ur gonna be here u wouldn't do the same for me

I replaced the swears myself because I do not want those words on my blog; I do not use them, appreciate seeing them and don't want to force anyone to see them either, even though we know what the words are.

I never asked for her plans to be changed; my mom decided that all on her own and we get the flack and the wrath of her hatred and anger. I am at the point right now that I don't even want to go spend any time there; I don't want to subject myself to the attitude we will get but I will go and I will be making sure to let her know, in person and in front of my mom, that we did not ask for her plans to be changed. I have text her, letting her know if we see her, we see her because we don't expect her to change her plans on such short notice just for a couple hour visit... I guess we see if I ever get a reply.

Trying oto focus on positive things but I have to admit that it hurts.  It seems my mom does whatever she can to sabbotage any progress we make with Rush. I just feel a little sad but I am beyond the point in my life where I let it bring me down.  This blog was started on the "working out" my feelings about Rush and I will continue to chronicle it so I can give the best testimony I can when our relationship has been completely restored!


  1. You do have a good outlook, look at that last line :O) Girl I am praying for you and loving you. She will one day be repentant!!!

  2. Thank you! I mean it; thank you! Your words are always so timely and kind and just what I need to hear in my down moments. I really appreciate your friendship and am emailing this to you as well because I want to make sure you see it.

    Thanks friend. Loving you too!