Sometimes

you can't listen to your first instint response...

Let me tell you a story to explain myself.

Now, I want to put this on record first, I am not telling you this because I want accolades because I certainly don't deserve them based on my knee jerk reaction.

It was -30 something Celsius here today, with a windchill. In a nutshell, COLD. I had some errands to run before I went to an afternoon training session for work. Now, I live in the rough end of town and usually when you see something out of the norm, you aren't really sure how you can or should respond.

So, here it is cold and out of the side of my vision about a half block ahead I see a figure on trying to stand up and people passing it by in their vehicles without pause.  As I got nearer to the figure I see it is an older man with a patch on one eye and a cane in his hand, trying with all his might to get up.

Knee jerk reaction: I am a girl, this is a man. It is cold out. Is this a trick? Does he really need help? A guy needs to stop and help him.

Split second after knee jerk reaction: No one else is stopping; I need to step up an step out and know that God is my shield.

I pulled over.  Found out who the man was (name, address, what's going on) as I was helping him to his feet. He was on his way to the hospital and so, after getting him to my car and calling my husband to tell him I was "going to be late for our (non-existant) meeting because I was taking so-and-so to the hospital" (Daddy didn't raise no fool; I still made sure that someone else knew who I was with, what he looked like, where we were going...) and I got my poor, new friend to the Emergency room at our hospital, checked in, triaged and made sure the nurses would make arrangements for him to get home.

What makes me sad is that he was out there struggling to get to his feet for an hour in this cold while people passed him by.  What makes me sadder, I was almost one of them... I don't ever want to be anything but the person who will go out of my way to help someone. I don't ever want to be like the religious people from "The Good Samaritan" story.  I don't every want to be the person who will see someone broken, lying in the ditch and crossing to the other side of the road to avoid dealing with it.

Today was a HUGE learning lesson for me, a growing moment that I am SO GLAD I learned from...

Here's the Thing

You know, the "thing"... I have not had internet, other than on my phone and it is just too difficult to be making any kind of blogposts on my phone. Sigh

I have had so many things...so many thoughts...and, alas, there was no venue for me to voice them other than my family and, I think they just might be getting a little tired of hearing my voice echoing these thoughts over and over. ha ha

Like I said, there has been SO much...all the things I learned from the conference I was just at (including all the things I learned just being on a road trip with 14 ladies!!!). I've been studying like a mad woman and, have sometimes, looked like one {grin}! There have been plenty of pictures taken and moments of celebration, grief, frustration and joy in the last, almost, month...

So, there's the thing...think you can bear with me as I take advantage of the internet being back...you may get hit with a plethera of verbal diarrhea..ha ha ha

Consider yourself warned. {GRIN}

From hearts of innocence

come words of simple beauty.

Last night we took turns praying for things/people that were on our hearts.

Bug wanted to pray for his sister, Rush.

His words were not many but so pure, simple and beautiful.

"Dear God, please help *Rush* turn and run back to you and have her make *4x4* run with her."

* 4x4 is my current blogname for Rush's boyfriend, at least until I can think of something a little better...who knows it make stick..

Sometimes you have to dig

through life that is...
No one ever said to me that because I became a Christian my life would be sunshine and roses and I am so very fortunate to not have had that misguided, preconceived notion looming over my head, especially this week.

Christian marriages have ups and downs and arguements and disappointments; children misbehave, act up...run away. Our houses aren't always spotless, our hair perfectly coiffed; we get runs in our stockings and, if you ask Lisa Bevere, sometimes our shoes don't even match and sometimes, life throws things at you that you never dreamed you would deal with (like when Rush ran away or..).

Take, for example, this past week. Dear friends of ours have been faced with the unthinkable, Our son, LilB, has been faced with the unthinkable.  His very good friend, and the son of the couple, I mentioned, was shot and killed on Thursday in a tragic run of horrific events that are just too complicated to delve into at this moment. He was a military man, a daddy, a husband, a friend, a son and his death is living a hole in everyone's life that was touched by him and his giant personality.

No, life is not perfect or a cake walk because you decide to be a Christian - don't let religion tell you otherwise. It won't always be an easy walk but what differs is how you dig through it. The father of the young man, stood up in front of the congregation of his church 2 days after his son was shot, declaring the goodness of God.  That is how I want to be able to respond out of brokeness and grief.  Mr. Long (sr and jr) you are on my list of heroes...

What wonders my eyes have seen

I have always valued the ability to look into the heart of someone by looking into their eyes. My grandfather taught me that from a very young age. I saw so much depth, so much joy, so much love, so much life and so much life lived in his own pale blue Scandinavian eyes.

I look into eyes every day and I have seen some ooglay things on the inside of peoples' eyes but it never changes the beauty of looking deep into their eyes and seeing their life.

Yesterday, I had the pleasure immense joy of taking care of one of our 101 year old patients and I, as I do each time she has come to the clinic, fell madly in love with her, as she is the sweetest, teeniest, dearest little grannies.  As I reached to put dilating drops in her eyes, I got choked up. In a split second, my mind raced in a flash slideshow of all the things her eyes have seen since 1911. The world has changed so much in her years here. I long to be able to capture the wisdom, life lessons and stories of these people, these pillars of strength and resilience...

Think about it. She has gone from no phone to facetime in her lifetime...there have been a lot of bumps in that road. I am getting emotional now just thinking about it. 

So many wonders her eyes have seen...

P.S. I have learned the secret to a long life from Miss Julia, as I call her; change your own lightbulbs. Last year, on her 100th birthday, she was standing on a kitchen chair, changing her own lightbulb. In other words, never put off doing what you can perfectly well do yourself because you just feel like getting someone else to do it for you...live until your purpose is up.

Dear Toby Mac,

My son, he's 8 and he thinks the world of you. He looks up to you as a role model; he dresses like you. He poses in pictures like you, sings like you. He has formed part of his identity around a man he thinks is a pretty cool dude and who he is pretty sure loves God just as much as he does and I admit, you portray an image that is cool and endearing and Godly and, I know you are only human so I don't expect super human acts of perfection but...

Please be the real deal. Please be being genuine and authentic. I am certain you are. Almost 100% certain. It's just...I'm his mom and I have seen the adoration in his eyes as he studies your moves on youtube, shows me that this is how you posed in a picture, diligently works at getting an outfit put together "just like Toby's" or proves yet again that the lyrics to your songs are etched deep into his precious mind.

Please don't do things that will simply and blatantly disregard the admiration you have earned from young guys, like my Bug. Again, I know you will make mistakes; it's not that...

It's just... please be the real deal...

Thank you for being a fun guy, with oodles of talent, that my son, who has music in his bones, can look up to just...well, I've said it all ready...

"Peace out, gangstah" {grin}

Family Jewels

And, no, I am not referring to Gene Simmons' show nor am I referring to pre-teen boys affectionate term for their...well, y'all know what I am not referring to.  What I am referring to is something that BigDaddy said to me after an amazing New Years Day visit with my cousin and her spectacular family, my aunt and uncle and my dad (all are equally spectacular).

On our way home, BigDaddy's eyes brimmed with tears as he quietly told me how amazing my family is. (yes, I ended the sentence there {Grin})  He said family events, in his family (moreso when he lived with his dad) involved eating, his dad and uncle getting too drunk and fist fights breaking out, threats of more severe violence and all that fun jazz.

My cousin and I had not been face-to-face in 21 years (to the day in fact) and it was as if we had never been apart, never a lull in conversation, joking, laughing, teasing...

My family loves to tease.

My family is ever increasingly precious to me and they bring me such joy and peace. I pray that your family is like that as well, that you know they are there through thick and thin, through joy and sadness, through laughs and tears, that time, distance and age shall never seperate you from those you love, that someone can look at your family and wish that that was what they had and that you never, ever take it for granted!

Anyway, getting back to my cousin, has anyone checked out her book? (the one I referred to here) We have read and re-read this book countless times...count.less!!!

The good news is...there is all ready another book in the works...not sure what it will be called or what it will be about or what the message is but, I can tell you this...it will be FAB. U. LOUS!!!