Monday, May 31, 2010

Almost done

The move that is - not the cleaning or the unpacking or the organizing but we are almost completely here.

Miss you all!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Tough day

I'm tired...

Tired of feeling like this....

Tired of not having the strength to tell people what is really going on behind closed doors. Tired of hiding bruises. Tired of hiding tears....

Tired of no one seeing the truth...

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

You know that piano playing chicken?

Wishing I had one of them right now.  I'm thinking it would be pretty easy to teach them to type...

I am SO very sore today.

Spent all day yesterday, until 10:00 sanding and painting in the new place.

Not done.


Going back there in 20 minutes.

My arms hurt

SO

BAD...

Here chick, chick chick!!!!

Sunday, May 16, 2010

'Cuz I like making lists - that's why!

Ok, I need a game plan and I need to be able to have access to the game plan, and, you know, not accidentally pack in a box or something.

It could happen.

{seriously}

So,  here is my week in a nutshell or, at least the things that I need to get done

Monday:
→ kids to school
→ go to grocery store to grab a few items for the week for school lunches (fruit and juiceboxes mainly)
→ clean Jewel's litter box and prepare for her to go with brother (in-law)
→ pack in Bug's room
→ go pick up Bug from school
→ make him lunch, say goodbye to Jewel, take a few minutes to cry
→ pack
→ get Jellybean from school
→ pack
→ make/eat supper
→ kids to music lessons
→ immediately following lesson, head to church for skit/song practice
→ no more packing tonight - just sleep

Tuesday
→ kids to school
→ packing
→ bottles to SARCAN for return
→ pick up Bug
→ packing and picking up Jellybean and supper
→ corporate prayer team meeting (why do I have to do this?)

Wednesday:
→ same as above (other than SARCAN and corporate prayer mtg)
→ song and skit practice

Thursday:

→ more packing
→ Day one of 4-day conference that I am demanded to be at

Friday:
→ no school for Bug
→ packing
→ Day two of conference (again I have to go to this...I just want to get my stuff done and be with my kids)
→ B.D. finally back home (hopefully I can actually get some help)

Let's Just Say

that I intended to fall asleep when I went to "close my eyes" for just a couple minutes as I was cooking supper.

And...

let's just say that we happen to like the cheese on our lasagna extra *ahem* golden brown.

And let's just say that it was wa-ay too hot out today for me to have used the oven anyway.

And let's just say that I am trying to not alllow these things to make me cranky.

And let's just say that I am SO taking me and the kids out for an ice cream cone after the  rehearsal for the skit and the practicing of the song...

And let's just say, we are not going to feel guilty about it AT. ALL!  {grin}

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Did somebody get the license on that bus?

Because I am pretty sure it ran me over.  I am physically exhausted.  I went to Manville at 9 yesterday morning and left at 11:30 last night.  I spent the entire time painting our new living space.  Two coats kitchen and living room and one coat in the three bedrooms before I went home due to the spasms I was having in my lower back. 

I just got a call to go over to do the final bedroom coats and it all needs to be re-done.  We kept telling them our unit was not ready to paint but due to time constraints for final inspection, we were told paint and what needs fixing we will fix and patch.  Once they saw how much work needed done (this morning) they told us they had to fix it; they are paying for our new paint and all that but my body hurts and it feels like it was for nothing.  Oh well, let's chock it up to exercise and call it even.

Now for some GREAT news!  My brother (in-law) stopped by again two days ago.  He is now on day 20 of his sobriety!  WOO HOO!!

Anyway, he and his girlfriend stopped by for supper and she fell in love with Jewel, our cat.  So, uncle is going to take our kitty to his house where we can know she is being loved on and cared for, and we can visit her.  Even in Trev's roughest years, there was no way he would ever not care for his animals.  We will miss her but there is such a relief to know that she is being taken care of and not just going to some stranger and that we can  still see her once in a while.

Time to get some more boxes filled...

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Clone me

Now that's a scary thought!  More than one of me running around this world.  Yikes!  I think the world can only handle one; seems like a credible thought process to me given I wasn't born a twin.  {grin}  I only jest; I know twins can be just as different as night and day.

Let me tell you why I need to be cloned once or twice - perhaps a bajillion times.  I actually only need the clones for a week, maybe two and then we can get rid of the excess me's before they run amuck. {grin}

In the next 7 days I have:

a house to pack up
a garage sale to hold
a new place to paint
a skit to rehearse with all my actors
a song to write
to find someone to write some music to the song
boxes to move and unpack
a 4 day conference beginning next Thursday (I really wish I didn't have to do this but I fear the repercussions if I don't)
no husband here to help me
a cat to find a home for
2 children to provide care for {for some reason they feel that they still need to eat when I am busy - GRIN}
a family of three still living with us

Wait a minute!  What in the world am I doing on here!?  I need to get to work!  Just needing to *visit* with my friends for a bit.

And about those clones... none of you happen to be mad scientists by profession or hobby?  No?  Just checking.  {Um, ppssstttt, email me mad scientist friends we'll get this whole cloning thing worked out, mkay?}

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Today my doorbell rang

and when I opened the door my brother (in-law) was standing on the step with a bright smile and shining eyes. 

Why is that a big deal?

We haven't had much to do with him, and he hasn't had much to do with us, over the last few years.   It has been hard.  We love him very much and we know he loves us just the same but, you  see, my brother is was very heavily into drugs and alcohol.  He just got out of detox and is on his way to a treatment center.

When I looked at his face, he looked different - clearer, brighter, lighter.  When he spoke, it was different - coherent, loving, confident.  I am hopeful for him and his sobriety.  We miss him.  The kids miss their uncle.

As he scooped Bug into his arms and Bug snuggled into his neck, Trev said to him, "I know I haven't been a good uncle to you.  I haven't been an uncle at all but that is going to change."

When he hugged me, as he said goodbye, it felt different.  He felt like he was really there! I know that in the world of those held captive by drugs, there is no certainty, but I just feel like our family is going to come back together.  We love him so very much and I plan to take advantage of him being there as much as I can for my family.

Today marks 16 days of his sobriety.  To the average person 16 days may not be a long time or be anything to excited about but, for those being held captive by the demons of drugs and alcohol, 16 days is a long time.  One day at a time right?

I cna't even begin to tell you how happy I feel right now.

Today, my doorbell rang and when I answered the door, it was hope knocking...

Moving

Wow, this is a lot of work.

This whole moving stuff.

Sorting stuff.

Throwing things out I was clinging to because I figured they held my memories.  How can a thing hold memories?  I hold the memories.

It's hard.

There are tears.

There have been *ahem* discussions.

It's not easy with another family of 3 living with us indefinitely as we go through 10 years of stuff and 10 years of those memories.

Just got a call though that we can go paint our new place tomorrow.  That will be nice.

Time is running out.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Not Really Excited

For Mother's Day that is.  I know I shouldn't feel this way and I should just focus on spending the day with the two beautiful kiddos that will be with me and not worrying about the 5 kiddos that won't. I know hope I will get calls, at least, from LilB, PB&J, Tuff and BabyK but, I wonder if I will hear from Rush.

I admit that it has, at times, consumed my thoughts, especially at work where I face the Mother's Day cards and I would silently wonder if she thinks of me enough to call or send a card.  Last year she wrote me a letter telling me how much I meant to her, the sacrifices she saw me make for her.

How fast times change.


Wednesday, May 5, 2010

This is how we do it, baby

Actually, this is where I ask you, how do you go about your shopping? Are you a once a week shopper? Every pay period?  Monthly? 

I tend to be the every 2 week/pay period shopper with a run to the store here and there {lately} because of absentmindeditis or some similar affliction.

But I am wondering what works for you and why?  How do you plan your shopping, with a meal plan?  Is is a set weekly plan, bi-weekly, monthly?  And...in your grocery budget do you only purchase food?  Do you have a separate budget for personal items, cleaning products, etc?

I lump it all in one.

I'm using this time of moving to fine tune some things in our lives from clutter, to budgets, to organizing, to... well, you get the idea and so I thought we could share our best tips with each other.

Since this is my game, I get to go first.

I found that as soon as you have more than one child the snack items in the house seem to become just another thing to argue about so...

I took matters into my own hands and got "shoebox" sized plastic containers, labelled them with each of the kids' names, and I divide snacks accordingly.  I will also pre-bag homemade cookies, crackers, etc for quick access in lunch making AND to avoid "She ate all the {insert delicious snack here}" or "Yeah!  Well, that's just 'cuz he ate all the {insert something equally tempting here}".

I would take pictures of our lovely snack boxes to share with you however, they are, presently, empty as grocery day is tomorrow, and baking day is on the weekend. 

Your turn...

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

I have a secret...

SSSsssssHHHHhhhh!

Don't tell anyone but...




All this organizing for the move and getting stuff into appropriate storage containers and {gasp} getting rid of stuff is really exciting! 

I am looking forward to a new start and a brand new chance to get my home organized once and for all!

With the change in housing size, organization is going to be key!

But, don't tell anyone.  I wouldn't want it to get out that I am enjoying this.  OK? Mmmmthanks.

Yeeeeuckkkk!

I would post a picture of what I  woke up to this morning but, I don't want to ruin your day too.  I know; I'm nice that way. You're welcome.

Anywhoodles, there is snow {YES, SNOW} everywhere!  EVERY. WHERE!  And it is very scarey out there - as far as road conditions.

Cars are flipped over in ditches and ambulances (well, one) are flipping over enroute to get those wounded in the initial car wreck. 

I hope, wherever you are, the snow has not come or, if it has, the roads are a lot safer than ours.

Maybe this afternoon I will post the picture(s); you know, so I don't make you lose your breakfast right now. {grin}

Monday, May 3, 2010

28 days

Yep, 28 days.  Depending on the circumstance, 28 days can seem like a long time.  When you are downsizing and moving into a different home, it feels like a deep breath. (on twitter I thought it was 27 but I remembered that there are 31 days in May.)

Today I had the day off and thus, the ability to collect some boxes and make some plans.  I have, to this point, gotten 1 1/2 boxes of kitchen stuff packed and a BIG box of stuff collected and priced for a garage sale.  I don't even know if I dare post pictures of the bags I end up throwing in the garbage.

Oh, speaking of which, I still owe a post showing what I got rid of on my last purging/clean sweep episode...with all the chaos of the last few days, I totally forgot. 

Off to take the kids to music; B.D. is out of town for the week, and when I get home I will continue with what I can pack so early.
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Speaking of B.D., his bounced cheques for child support to his e-wife mean I get to figure out how to pay yet another debt....

Saturday, May 1, 2010

You know a growth spurt's coming when...

You feed your 6 year old son a lunch of a chicken taco and a handful of chips with a drink and an apple and, he says he is just a little more hungry, can he have a bit more and comes back with this...


TWO cheese sandwiches...

The Times

They are a changin'...

Yesterday brought, for my family, a lot of change - very quickly and my head is still reeling from it all.

Our current landlord informed us that he is raising our rent by almost $400.  This is the same man who gave us his word that he would NOT raise the rent on this house as long as we lived here.  Um, thanks for that. 

It sounds like we will be moving into those townhouses that we have been helping to renovate and we will be moving in for June 1.  I have lots and lots and LOTS of stuff to go through and get rid of now and there will be an increase in rent but it will be $130 not $400.  I also think that the utility bills will be lower there as they are a newly renovated and "fit" better.

I do NOT want to move my family here...it's the middle of the ghetto! Gangs all around. It is not safe. I am alone with my kids more often than not because of pomp, prestige and self-importance of someone's job and "position" within his "wonderful" church.

I will have to see how things are going but I may be pretty quiet for the next little while.  I will still post (maybe just quick ones or something) but I may not be able to keep up-to-date on your blogs for a month or so. 

Please bear with me my friends and think of me as I do this alone...again...because B.D. will be gone for most of the month with work.  I know I wanted to get out of this house because of memories and all but now that the time has come, I am a bit saddened by it because there are 10 years of really good memories here as well but that's the great thing about good memories, you can take them with you.  {grin} And I really don't want to go to where it has been decided for us to go.


The times are definitely changing...