Choices

Life is full of them, isn't it? Our days are full of them...

I know I daily make right and wrong choices...I just hope that the right outweigh the wrong at the end of the day.

We have been VERY busy in our house with Science Fair projects - two of them. Jellybean did her project on crystallization via Coal Flowers and Bug wanted to show how to make a magnet using a battery, nail and copper wire.  Our choice: to help them to get organized, arrange their thoughts, their processes and then support them in what they had to do after that. 

The Science Fair was yesterday (we won't know who wins until tomorrow) but, there were a few projects where you can tell the parents did the majority of the work instead of merely supporting the children as they learned and worked. That was their choice and I do not judge them for that. Our choice, however, was to make sure our children knew they were supported as they succeeded at what they chose to do.

There were two MAJOR meltdowns this year. Jellybean had one two days before the "big day" as there were daily journals, project reports, single page analyze reports, and the list goes on and on...she became overwhelmed. We could have, and resisted choosing getting right into the midst of what she was doing and take over but...I decided to take her in my arms for a moment, soothed her tears, told her how bright and smart she is and that she is perfectly capable of achieving all she was hoping to accomplish.  I encouraged her and her little brother gave her a big hug and told her I he believed in her.  Bug had his the night before. "What am I supposed to say to the judges? I can't talk to them!" We talked it out, did a few practice runs, hugged, laughed and sent him off to bed to just get a good night's rest.

That next day, as much as I wanted to not go to work so I could go to the Science Fair, I wanted to send my kids a good message. I went to work, grabbed a lunch I could eat in the car and on my lunch break zipped over to see and support my babies.  The responses from the judges were so positive. Bug was told that he presented his project very well and really understood what he was saying! Jellybean's feedback was super positive too! {Tomorrow we find out the results and, to be honest, both kids are hoping they don't win first place as there is a next level to go on to}

I could have stepped in and did a lot more work with the kids than I did but what kind of lesson would that have been. I don't know if our choice was right or wrong, more right or more wrong than what the other parents did or didn't do but I do know that for our children, the decision was right.  They came home with a sense of accomplishment, a sense of overcoming and a sense of consequence to their decisions.

We have a busy house so arranging and organizing time to do these projects has been a challenge for both.  Bug came home the night of the Science Fair, settled into the couch, snuggled into a blanket and asked if he could please just stay there all night. "I was pretty stressed out, guys."

I think it is so funny that, as much as they want to have done well, the best either of the kids wish to have gotten is third because that ensures they will not be moving on to the next level in March. I, personally, think that they have all ready won so much more than a ribbon; they both feel such a sense of accomplishment, of overcoming a, seemingly, hopeless challenge and a job well-done. I am so proud of those kids and so relieved that neither one of them want to do this again, so far, next year... {grin}

Sometimes

you can't listen to your first instint response...

Let me tell you a story to explain myself.

Now, I want to put this on record first, I am not telling you this because I want accolades because I certainly don't deserve them based on my knee jerk reaction.

It was -30 something Celsius here today, with a windchill. In a nutshell, COLD. I had some errands to run before I went to an afternoon training session for work. Now, I live in the rough end of town and usually when you see something out of the norm, you aren't really sure how you can or should respond.

So, here it is cold and out of the side of my vision about a half block ahead I see a figure on trying to stand up and people passing it by in their vehicles without pause.  As I got nearer to the figure I see it is an older man with a patch on one eye and a cane in his hand, trying with all his might to get up.

Knee jerk reaction: I am a girl, this is a man. It is cold out. Is this a trick? Does he really need help? A guy needs to stop and help him.

Split second after knee jerk reaction: No one else is stopping; I need to step up an step out.

I pulled over.  Found out who the man was (name, address, what's going on) as I was helping him to his feet. He was on his way to the hospital and so, after getting him to my car and calling my boss to tell him I was "going to be late for our (non-existant) meeting because I was taking so-and-so to the hospital" (Daddy didn't raise no fool; I still made sure that someone else knew who I was with, what he looked like, where we were going...) and I got my poor, new friend to the Emergency room at our hospital, checked in, triaged and made sure the nurses would make arrangements for him to get home.

What makes me sad is that he was out there struggling to get to his feet for an hour in this cold while people passed him by.  What makes me sadder, I was almost one of them... I don't ever want to be anything but the person who will go out of my way to help someone.

Today was a HUGE learning lesson for me, a growing moment that I am SO GLAD I learned from...

Here's the Thing

You know, the "thing"... I have not had internet, other than on my phone and it is just too difficult to be making any kind of blogposts on my phone. Sigh

I have had so many things...so many thoughts...and, alas, there was no venue for me to voice them other than my family and, I think they just might be getting a little tired of hearing my voice echoing these thoughts over and over. ha ha

Like I said, there has been SO much...all the things I learned from the conference I was just at (including all the things I learned just being on a road trip with 14 ladies!!!). I've been studying like a mad woman and, have sometimes, looked like one {grin}! There have been plenty of pictures taken and moments of celebration, grief, frustration and joy in the last, almost, month...

So, there's the thing...think you can bear with me as I take advantage of the internet being back...you may get hit with a plethera of verbal diarrhea..ha ha ha

Consider yourself warned. {GRIN}

Sometimes you have to dig

through life that is...
No one ever said to me that my life would be sunshine and roses and I am so very fortunate to not have had that misguided, preconceived notion looming over my head, especially this week.

Life has ups and downs and arguements and disappointments; children misbehave, act up...run away. Our houses aren't always spotless, our hair perfectly coiffed; we get runs in our stockings, sometimes our shoes don't even match and sometimes, life throws things at you that you never dreamed you would deal with (like when Rush ran away or..).

Take, for example, this past week. Dear friends of ours have been faced with the unthinkable, Our son, LilB, has been faced with the unthinkable.  His very good friend, and the son of the couple, I mentioned, was shot and killed on Thursday in a tragic run of horrific events that are just too complicated to delve into at this moment. He was a military man, a daddy, a husband, a friend, a son and his death is living a hole in everyone's life that was touched by him and his giant personality.

Life is sometimes pretty shitty....

What wonders my eyes have seen

I have always valued the ability to look into the heart of someone by looking into their eyes. My grandfather taught me that from a very young age. I saw so much depth, so much joy, so much love, so much life and so much life lived in his own pale blue Scandinavian eyes.

I look into eyes every day and I have seen some ooglay things on the inside of peoples' eyes but it never changes the beauty of looking deep into their eyes and seeing their life.

Yesterday, I had the pleasure immense joy of taking care of one of our 101 year old patients and I, as I do each time she has come to the clinic, fell madly in love with her, as she is the sweetest, teeniest, dearest little grannies.  As I reached to put dilating drops in her eyes, I got choked up. In a split second, my mind raced in a flash slideshow of all the things her eyes have seen since 1911. The world has changed so much in her years here. I long to be able to capture the wisdom, life lessons and stories of these people, these pillars of strength and resilience...

Think about it. She has gone from no phone to facetime in her lifetime...there have been a lot of bumps in that road. I am getting emotional now just thinking about it. 

So many wonders her eyes have seen...

P.S. I have learned the secret to a long life from Miss Julia, as I call her; change your own lightbulbs. Last year, on her 100th birthday, she was standing on a kitchen chair, changing her own lightbulb. In other words, never put off doing what you can perfectly well do yourself because you just feel like getting someone else to do it for you...live until your purpose is up.

5 Question Friday

1. What is the weather like where you are and do you like it? Heh! I just sort of answered this question here as we have been having "stuhrange" weather for this time of year.  

Let me see, our weather is about as reliable as the weatherman him/herself. Summers are either uber dry or you get webbed feet, and can range in temps from 20 C to 35 C, as an average. Falls are crisp and painted; Winter can be extreme (unlike this year, as outlined in the linked blog). Spring is puddles, puddles and more puddles, throw in one last major blizzard about April/May and then the nice weather comes out...

It may sound crummy, unreliable & not very inviting but, it is the weather I have grown accustomed to. Each season has its own special beauty mark...just one question though, WHAT is with the mosquitoes?! Anyone else have mosquitoes big enough to carry off small children? 

2. When you're sick what do you seek comfort from?

It depends on the sickness but all in all, I want my Dad. I remember how he would stroke my forehead as a young child when I didn't feel good and his voice was soft, soothing and comforting. BigDaddy has tried but, in the height of an extreme fever, I may or may not have said to him, once or twice, "Just get me my dad! You can't do it right!" . Poor guy, and yet he still puts up with me.

3. What do you need to do before the end of the month?

Save up enough money.

4. Have you ever served on a jury?

No, I got called to jury duty one time. The accused was charged with (and eventually found guilty of) attacking a corrections worker in the jail he was all ready serving a sentence.  When asked if I could be impartial, I had to inform them that several of my family (including my mom and brother) are corrections workers and, NO, I could NOT judge him with an ounce of impartiality (word? no? seems like it to me)

5. If you could be any animal, what would you be and why?

You have stumped the unstumpable (very much a word! Well, now it is!)

Ok, my animal is really a bird (counts right?). I would want to be an eagle. An eagle is a symbol of strength, beauty, authority, freedom and grace. An eagle can sense a storm coming and instead of running and hiding from it, he flies right into the center of it, using the currents of the storm to rise and fly higher ( I want to be able to say the same of myself, instead of running from the storms of my life that I used them to rise and fly higher)

I heard once, whether it is true or not is irrelevent to me because the image of it is just too beautiful to care,but it was stated that eagles will fly toward the sun when predatory birds are in pursuit, or have wounded the eagle, in order to lose them. I would like to be able to personify that in my life. 

So...there you go...I thought I had no answer but I kind of like my non-answer answer...what say you?

You want to join in the fun? Hop on over to MamaM's blog, see her answers and read the answers of some other fantastic ladies!

Well, the weather outside is ________

You finish the sentence.

I know the Christmas song states it as "fightful" and... depending on your perspective, one could say it is so right now but...

Here in northern Canada, January usually brings us -40 degrees Celsius with winds that cut to your bone marrow and whip snow like teeny little ninja stars; where children brave the elements just for five minutes of fresh air by wearing about 8 layers of clothes and their scarves pulled up to their bottom lashes and their toques (snow hats) pulled down to their top (creating prime conditions for frosted lashes).  Bug calls this look being made into a ninja.

Well, this winter we have had, perhaps 2 days of weather that made you snuggle down and shrink into your scarf.  The rest of the days have been -10 C (14 F) or warmer and that was great for a time, albeit an unsettling visual as we are desperately lacking quantities of snow...

Now that it is January it is incredibly unsettling, while I still enjoy the warmth and not feeling like my appendages will shatter or fall off as I contend with the elements. Today, for example, was +1 C (33.8 F)... with rain, more like British Columbia weather (think Vancouver). Tonight, the rain has turned to a thinly veiled sheet of glare ice covered in slush and rain puddles. I drove 34 km/hr (which is roughly 62 mph) on my way home. If I dared to go even that 1 km/h more, I fishtaled, swerved, and slithered on the ice like an eel through water... (gross visual)

I have never lived a winter like this one, at least not in my remembrance. Some of our cute little old-man farmer patients tell me 1989 was similar...another told me 1967 in BC was the same.

It's unsettling. You may think I am insane but...the cold serves a purpose.  Viruses die. We get enough snow to sustain moisture the following farming season. Viruses die...did I mention viruses die...

Anywho, I am not all "freaked out and stockpiling canned goods and buying generators" unsettled but it just seems weird