I.C.U. too much

That's right I.C.U. too much but I don't mean you or you - really I don't.  I worked in I.C.U., or Intensive Care Unit, on Saturday; I am a ward clerk there.  I worked 8 hours there on Saturday, as I said, and then I ended up spending some unscheduled and unwanted time there yesterday on personal business. 

At church yesterday morning our very dear friend began having intense chest pains; he had been having pains on and off for a couple of days now but he is a stubborn, stubborn man! During service BigB ran over to me (he is the head usher so we never sit together at church), threw the car keys at me and told me he was rushing W to the hospital!

I brought the kids home, fed them and went up to the hospital to get BigB and S (W's wife) to take them out to eat.  She is diabetic and hadn't eaten since early that morning.  I spent some time in the ER trauma room after I brought W an MP3 player and S a coffee and stayed with them as the doctor decided it was best to admit W to ICU for observation and to keep an eye on his Trop levels.

Today, it sounds like he is doing better- not yet discharged but better.  It was so very hard to reign in panic and worry and to not let those bad thoughts take over and run amuck.  I kept on saying to myself things like "God is bigger than this and it will all be ok" and "I do not allow these thoughts to control me - worry will NOT control me".

It was easier said than done.

A lady I work with wasn't feeling well the other day and was sent home from work; she went to lay down.  Fifteen minutes later her husband went to check on her and she had passed away.  Her funeral is today. She was 47 years old.

I have an uncle in the hospital dying right now from brain cancer and another just got out of the hospital after having a stroke.  Both of these uncles are barely 60 years old. The uncle who had the stroke has to wait who knows how long to get a specialist appointment to see how he is doing.  Where he lives there isn't much for medical care, let alone specialist.  My uncle seriously lives with the polar bears.

Now I don't say these things because I am looking for sympathy; I am not sad.  Well, I am sad but I am not grief-stricken by any means.  Some people don't understand that.  I love all these people (except for the lady I worked with - I only knew of her) but I keep focusing on God, praying and knowing that He can and will bring fullness and wholeness to all of these situations.  Does this mean my uncle won't die from the cancer that is keeping him in the hospital right now?  Not for sure.  But I know that if (and when he does eventually die) God will strengthen me and give me the peace I need.

But for now, I am going to go hug my family, spend some time with them and enjoy their company.  We aren't guaranteed tomorrow - spend today wisely.